Thank you for sharing your perspective on the role of confidence and chivalry in relationships. It's clear that your experiences have given you a deep insight into the complexities of self-esteem and how external validation, or the lack thereof, can significantly influence one's self-perception.
Firstly, you raise an important point about chivalry. Indeed, traditional concepts of chivalry don't inherently demand confidence or assertiveness. Historically, chivalry was more about honor, respect, and courtesy, which don't necessarily correlate with confidence. However, the modern interpretation often associates chivalry with a certain level of self-assurance, perhaps because acts of kindness and respect are sometimes easier to enact when one feels secure in oneself.
Your observation about the impact of constant rejection or negative feedback is particularly poignant. It's true that being continually told you're not good enough can severely damage anyone's confidence. This is a significant issue in our society, where the pressure to conform to certain standards of attractiveness or behavior can lead to a continuous cycle of self-doubt and lack of self-worth.
Regarding players and their apparent confidence, it's a complex situation. While it may seem that they gain confidence from positive reinforcement, it's worth considering that this might be a superficial layer of self-assuredness. True confidence, the kind that's resilient and grounded in a genuine sense of self-worth, is usually built over time and through more substantial experiences than just external validation.
Your personal story about finding confidence through the belief and support of your partner is incredibly touching. It highlights an essential truth: sometimes, the path to believing in ourselves is illuminated by the belief others have in us. This doesn't mean our self-worth should be entirely dependent on others, but rather that relationships and connections can be a powerful source of affirmation and growth.
In conclusion, while it's crucial to work on finding confidence within ourselves, it's equally important to acknowledge the role that our environment, experiences, and relationships play in shaping our self-esteem. Your journey is a testament to the transformative power of supportive and affirming relationships, and it's a reminder that while we can tell ourselves we have value, sometimes it's the echo of that belief in someone else's words and actions that truly helps us to internalize it.