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How to Break Free From a Toxic Relationship Without Feeling Guilty
Yes, toxic relationships are a thing. They’re not fun and not easy, but they happen. And if you’ve found yourself in one, it’s essential to know that there are ways out of them without feeling guilty about doing what’s best for yourself.
Pay attention to the story you tell yourself about why you’re with this person.
One of the most challenging things about breaking free from a toxic relationship is how it can leave you feeling selfish and guilty. “But they’re the one who keeps me up at night,” you might think. “They make me feel like my life isn’t worth living without them.” These thoughts are part of what psychologists call “storytelling.”
Your story about why you’re with this person or maintaining the connection to them may be positive or negative: You might tell yourself that this person makes you happy; or that if you don’t stay with them, no one else will ever love or accept you; or that no one else could ever understand your pain as they do — the list goes on. But whatever form these stories take, they’re more often than not just stories we’ve told ourselves: They aren’t necessarily true! And even if they are confirmed in some sense, why should we let ourselves suffer when there’s another option?
